Almost time to get going

Well my time in California is drawing to a close. It is bittersweet. I was doing good until we went to Wyatt's football team party. I did start crying. I just kept thinking about how long we have known these boys and how it sad it will be not seeing them grow up anymore. This is where I broke down. I have been close a few more times but it is getting harder and harder to keep it together. There are so many things to do still and I am trying to get everything ready for Christmas too. This should be an interesting week but my class is finished and now I can focus on gettng the house ready for Friday and ready for Christmas.

I will post more about the travels across the country to the South.

Getting ready for a move

So I know I haven't written on this for a while but someone gave me a great idea to start writing again. OUr family is getting ready to change duty stations. This is our first one EVER. I am a little scared but VERY excited. We are headed to Meridian Mississippi. Now this is going to be an adventure for all of us. We all have been born and raised on the West coast. I went to the south when I was 16 but only for a week. Someone gave me the great idea to write about my expierences while we are there. So I am going to start now. Phase one: packing up a 4 bedroom house in 25 days. The hubby got the brilliant idea to move ourselves. So starting next week I am frantically packing up our house. Ok that is all for now I will keep everyone updated. Thanks for the support and if I snap at you please forgive me I am under a HUGE amount of stress right now.

So Many Emotions

I have never been so proud to be a military spouse than I am tonight. My heart is bursting with pride. However, my mind is spinning with worry. I have tears of joy and tears of worry. I worry for our troops still deployed overseas. I fear for their safety. Seeing the people rejoicing in the street over his death I have mixed emotions, I am happy to see the people happy but I fear for how this will look to the rest of the world. I worry about retaliation towards our troops. I pray that everyone stays safe. I am confident in the ability of our service members currently deployed in the training they have received to stay safe. Just continue to pray for everyone involved including the family members.

New Beginnings part 2

So over the last couple weeks I have made a few major changes in our lives. First one was home schooling the biggest boy. I could not be happier with that choice. He is doing AMAZING. The next one was to trade in my car and get a new one. I was so tired of waiting for something else to go wrong with the van. SO last Saturday I drove the kids out to Lake Elsinore to look at a car, all this after 2 soccer games and a day at the housing carnival, we were there till almost 11pm. We ended up buying a 2007 GMC Yukon. I LOVE IT!!! Plus as I was looking at the car the man called so it was like it was a sign. I feel like I am making all sorts of changes while he is gone and I am worried what he will think when he comes home. I know he is good with all the decisions that I have made but, with my new camera, the new car, home schooling, Disneyland passes, AND trying to build up my credit seems like a lot to take on while he is gone.

So while I was in the process of purchasing the car I had my credit checked and it is a pretty good score but it could be better. SO I have made it my goal to bring it up. I am almost 35 years old and just found out what my score was. 650, not bad but it could be better. I was afraid to find out what it was because.... I don't know why I was scared I just was.

This is the start of the fun phase of the deployment. We have gotten past the beginning phase, the acting out everything going wrong phase to the everyone getting along, no big surprises, got into a good routine phase. Now just as we get into a good groove the next phase will start. The acting out cuz the deployment is almost over phase.

SO MY ADVISE FOR TODAY IS TO ENJOY THE SECOND PHASE OF DEPLOYMENTS WHILE IT LASTS. IT MAY BE LONELY BUT YOU ARE INTO YOUR RHYTHM AND IT WON'T BE MUCH LONGER TILL YOUR LOVE COMES HOME.

A weight off of my mind

I know that with everyone concerned over the potential Government Shutdown everyone was starting to panic about how it would affect the Military personnel. It would have had a HUGE affect on us. Not just financially. Yes we like alot of people would have struggled but it would have had an affect on our kids. They would have had to have given up their soccer until things got resolved. Now I know that this seems trivial with people wondering how they were going to feed their families if we did not get paid, but when you are trying to keep a sense of normalcy in a child's life this could have been a HUGE change in their routine.

I was worried about the no paycheck thing but not so much for me (I have a little money saved) but I was more worried for the lower ranking families that are barely scraping by as it is. This had been weighing on my mind alot this week. So here is my advise for today:

EVEN IF IT IS HARD (and trust me I know it is) TRY TO PUT SOME MONEY ASIDE FOR A RAINY DAY. YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN YOU WILL NEED IT AND IF YOU CAN NOT PUT MONEY ASIDE GET A LIST OF ALL THE ORGANIZATIONS ON BASE OR IN YOUR COMMUNITY THAT CAN HELP IN AN EMERGENCY.


Be kind t one another an cherish the time you do get to spend with one another.

The little things

During the day to day mundane activities is when you think about how much easier life would be if the man was at home. For example; I am sitting here staring out the back window (yes in the dark) realizing that I have not mowed the grass since he left and my backyard looks like a jungle. The grass is so tall that the dogs won't go into it. They have made a diagonal line though the yard to get around it. But as I look at it I keep thinking man I hate mowing the lawn this is a guy job. But I know that I HAVE to do it so tomorrow I will suck it up and mow the lawn and brave the jungle.

I was watching "Coming Home" and a husband said this about his wife: people come up to him and tell him Thank you all the time for serving his country. He said that he appreciates them for telling him that but that his wife was the true hero. She stayed home and kept everything in order back home for him. This was his definition of a hero and his wife was his hero.

ADVISE FOR TODAY Military Wives are very special strong women. We are heroes even if we don't see that we are. We help one another and that is important. Be kind to one another. We need to support each other.

Interesting thoughts

If a child throws a rock into the water, like skipping a rock, and it hits a fish does the child get in trouble? Just kidding. But I do have some interesting thoughts that go through my head during the day. Mostly I hear music through out the day in my head but here is one: Why is that when people drive and they have their windows up does it make the area soundproof so the person can sing at the top of their lungs. If you are walking in the woods and you stop and hug a tree does that make you an environmentalist or a tree hugger?

Have you ever just stopped and smelled a tree? Each one has a very distinct smell. I love to do that when I go home to Oregon. I know weird but this is what I think about.

Deployment advise Day 2-  STOP AND SMELL THE TREES (OR FLOWERS) THINGS MAY LOOK BAD AND LONELY BUT ENJOY THE LIE YOU ARE GIVEN. THINGS COULD BE WORSE

New beginning

I feel at peace right now. I found a program that I like and The big boy will be enrolled by the end of the week. I am excited I think he is really going to like it. He was excited about the programs they have available for the GATE students. I know that this is best and even right now The big boy feels different, lighter, almost like a huge weight has been lifted off his shoulders. That as a parent makes me feel good. I can see the dark circles going away already. I know this is not going to be easy and I may have to make a sacrifice and stop working but I know this is for the best.

So deployment advise Day 1- DO NOT DOUBT YOURSELF AS A PARENT. IF SOMETHING DOESN'T FEEL RIGHT GO WITH YOU INSTINCTS. IT WILL MAKE EVERYONE HAPPIER

First post

Well I am writing my first Blog post. I am a little nervous about doing it after I have taken my ambien but I feel that this was the only way I could be totally honest. Life as the spouse of a deployed military member is really hard. It sucks having to do everything on your own. Oh and god forbid that it is not your first deployment you are supposed to just suck it up and get over it and move on. (Well that is how I am made to feel sometimes) It's hard. When the kids don't behave, you don't know where exactly your husband is at or what he is doing, you are trying to keep it all together so no one will think that you are overwhelmed. I love my children to death, I would die or them. I don't care if they are rotten to the core they are my kids and I love them. Now my kids aren't bad but when my husband left my oldest son started acting out in school a little bit. Nothing major just some bad choices well he feels that even if he does try to move past it in his class he is being constantly reminded that he messed up. Was told today that someone he looked up to know longer respected him because he made a mistake. A little harsh for an 11 year old people pleaser. All he wants is to make adults happy and proud of him. It means nothing coming from me. We have said this many times before the man left and every time we think it has been resolved it rears its ugly head again.
I know my kids are good, I know I am a good parent. But we feel like we can not win with this teacher right now or the class in general. Just my first blog for the night..... look for more about things to do to survive a deployment